Saturday, November 24
its a Saturday morning(early early morning, 3AM)
and i'm blogging.
The week has'nt been so great. Full of mood swings, and the whole PMS monthly package all nicely rolled out over this week.
Friday and Saturday ARE MY OFF DAYS!
Spent my day today(Friday) shopping, shopping and shopping.
Its been've so long since i got to destress and do some serious(read: serious) retail therapy.
met bei to pass her the camera. and in the end, after asking her for an opinion on this dress i had wanted to buy..she left off with bq and i, for home to meet nesh. I FORGOT TO PASS HER TO CAMERA! it was pretty dumb i must say. Oh well.
Got home, packed my things and headed for a studying session with the boyfriend, more like tutoring session. watching him study made me realize how much i missed school yet i'm thankful its all over, for now at least. I mean i DO plan to take my degree sometime soon before i get married. So that'll probably be when i'm 24 and ideally, i'd like to settle down at the age of 28.
that's still a looonng way to go. just the other day, was talking to one of my Staff Nurses.
She's really good, in terms of patient care and all that. You know, one of those few role-model nurses with the 'passion' for nursing. And i was talking to her about the whole career path. And i asked her if she's gonna be promoted to Senior Staff Nurse anytime soon, considering the fact that performance wise, she's excellent. And she told me, for what? I replied..
huh, but the money is good right? And she said, what's the point? I dont care about the money, i'm happy with where i am. What's the point of earning so much of money, working overly hard and you only get to see your husband and son a few hours a day. And this was the part that hit me the most: she said, you know when my son could crawl, i did'nt even know he could actually crawl! And the saddest part was that, my son's first word was "papa" and not me. She only works the 8-5 shift now so she can spend just some 3 hours with her son..and i think she's way off happier this way.
I dont know, but whatever she said made sense. Initially in nursing, when u first start off, frankly the money is'nt very good. But if your performance is good(btw, nurses are graded every year and it affects our bonuses and promotions), you get pay increments and by the 2nd-3rd year, you earn quite a bit. Frankly, i'm not too concerned about the money either..everyone knows i do enjoy nursing very very much and at this point in life, i just want to be happy. And i must say right now, i have everything i need to fulfill that. I'm not a person who can be doing something i dont like because it might just drive me up the wall. If i was'nt in Nursing, i would'nt know what else be suited for me. In nursing, you give alot, and you get as much back too. NOTHING in this world, can be better than, caring for a really sick patient, for a week or two, watch her condition deteoriate and eventually get better..and at the end of it, despite all the mood swings of her and a whole lot of other patients, you have to put up with.. when you finally discharge the patient, she's on that wheelchair, with alot more of energy and vibe. She smiles and you and thanks you over and over again, and kisses you. NOTHING else can beat that. that's just a part of the daily job satisfaction i get. And mind you, i'm not in nursing because "i cant make it". thank you.
A while back, during my posting at the A&E, i met this Air Stewardess, brought in by the ambulance, you could tell she was from SIA from those red painted fingernails. but anyway, she came in for a terrible back pain. So we just had to do a whole lot of distraction therapy, we talked about almost everything under the sun. She had just got back from her flight from London, and my other colleague was just commenting on how wonderful it must have been to be there..and then she said yeah but you wont understand how much i have to go through..and then enough said. I did'nt quite know what to say but I just smiled and tried reassuring her bout things, transferred her to the obs room and my job was done.
Anyway i think u all get my point.
As cliche cliche cliche as this might sound. Right now, i'm trying to make this paramount in MY life at least..and that is happiness.
I've gotta go get some beauty sleep.
I'm already missing you baby. sigh.
Goodnight world.
impulsively and honestly,
yours truly
3:05 AM
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